Bringing My Mother to Jesus

Posted on January 23, 2026 by Esther Hizsa

A few days later, when Jesus again entered Capernaum, the people heard that he had come home. They gathered in such large numbers that there was no room left, not even outside the door, and he preached the word to them. Some men came, bringing to him a paralyzed man, carried by four of them. Since they could not get him to Jesus because of the crowd, they made an opening in the roof above Jesus by digging through it and then lowered the mat the man was lying on. When Jesus saw their faith, he said to the paralyzed man, “Son, your sins are forgiven.”

Now some teachers of the law were sitting there, thinking to themselves, “Why does this fellow talk like that? He’s blaspheming! Who can forgive sins but God alone?”

Immediately Jesus knew in his spirit that this was what they were thinking in their hearts, and he said to them, “Why are you thinking these things? Which is easier: to say to this paralyzed man, ‘Your sins are forgiven,’ or to say, ‘Get up, take your mat and walk’?  But I want you to know that the Son of Man has authority on earth to forgive sins.” So he said to the man, “I tell you, get up, take your mat and go home.” He got up, took his mat and walked out in full view of them all. This amazed everyone and they praised God, saying, “We have never seen anything like this!”–Mark 2:1-12 (NIV)

When I imagined myself in this story,
I was one of the four
and friends were at the other corners.
My mother was on her deathbed,
and we were bringing her to Jesus
so he could take her home.

But like a bad dream,
a crowd blocked our way.
I could see Jesus inside teaching.
Then, he caught my eye.
I saw the urgency in his eyes,
the desire in his heart
to see my mom
one last time on this earth.

Then I got an idea.
You know how the story goes.
We lowered her through the roof.

But you don’t know
that in my story
Jesus smiled and thanked me
for my creativity,
for all the ways I bring my mom to him.
He thanked our friends.

Then Jesus held my mother’s hand
and, with a tear in his eye,
he caught her final breath
and took her to rest.

At the hospice,
I hold my mom’s hand
and play the song again,
and we picture how
it will be
when it happens.

Even from my mother’s womb
Never hidden from Your view
I was always known to You
When I fade away in death
You will catch my final breath
You will take me to my rest.
–Paul Zach, Always With Me

Credits and References:
Bible story image Distant Shores Media/Sweet Publishing, Wikimedia Creative Commons
Bringing My Mother to Jesus by Esther Hizsa, 2026
© Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim, 2026.
The unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without permission from Esther Hizsa is prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used provided there is a link to the original content and credit is given as follows: © Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim 2013-2026.  http://www.estherhizsa.com

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The Human Reason

Posted on January 16, 2026 by Esther Hizsa

 A leper came to him begging him, and kneeling he said to him, “If you choose, you can make me clean.”  Moved with pity, Jesus[stretched out his hand and touched him, and said to him, “I do choose. Be made clean!”  Immediately the leprosy left him, and he was made clean. After sternly warning him he sent him away at once, saying to him, “See that you say nothing to anyone; but go, show yourself to the priest, and offer for your cleansing what Moses commanded, as a testimony to them.” But he went out and began to proclaim it freely, and to spread the word, so that Jesus could no longer go into a town openly, but stayed out in the country; and people came to him from every quarter.
–Mark 1:40-45 (NRSVCE)

I’ve thought about this story 
and many times wondered the divine reason 
Jesus warned the man with leprosy
not to tell anyone. 
Surely Jesus, being God, knew the man
would spread the word.

Then, I entered the story
and saw the human reason. 
Jesus was exhausted.
He hoped that if the man didn’t tell anyone 
until after he’d seen the priest, 
Jesus would get a break– 
a day or two of rest. 

But no. 
Now, there were ten,
twenty,
thirty– 
a whole leper colony 
gathered at his door.

I saw the disappointment in Jesus’ eyes, 
the sense of betrayal in his sigh.
After all I did for this man, 
Couldn’t he do this one thing for me? 

I watched him close the door,
seethe with anger, 
sink into despair,
and wrestle with forgiveness. 

I stood there, 
heart beating in my ears. 
Was Jesus going to turn them all away? 

Of course, you know he didn’t. 
He prayed,
poured it all out to God. 
There, in his Father’s loving arms,
Jesus received
the compassion he needed
to be moved with pity for himself,
the freedom he needed 
to forgive,
the sight he needed
to see each person as beloved
until once more, 
he was moved with pity
for the precious ones 
who’d come to him to be healed.

The sun rose 
as Jesus remained with them,
asleep on the door step.
The healed didn’t do what Jesus asked.
They didn’t go,
but watched over their Lord,
so no one disturbed his rest. 

He comes, the Lord, as one of us.
–Kate Bluett and Paul Zach, He Comes

Credits and References:
Christ Healing the Leper, from The Story of Christ, print, Georg Pencz (MET, 17.3.1280) Wikipedia Commons.
The Human Reason by Esther Hizsa, 2026
Man sleeping on the street, Leon, Nicaragua by David Surý. Used with permission.
© Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim, 2026.
The unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without permission from Esther Hizsa is prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used provided there is a link to the original content and credit is given as follows: © Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim 2013-2026.  http://www.estherhizsa.com

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You Know Enough

Posted on January 9, 2026 by Esther Hizsa

We have known and believe the love that God has for us.
–1 John 4:16a (NRSVUE)

The word for this new year 
that came to you 
–of all the words, this one 
and of all people, you– 
what if it isn’t what you should be 
but what you already are? 
What if it isn’t what you should do 
but what God is already doing in you? 
What if it’s both what you seek 
and what you already have? 

You know enough 
to believe God loves you. 
All God is asking of you this year 
is to receive it.
Let Love sink in
and settle
into all the places 
your fears are hiding.

God is love, and those who abide in love abide in God, and God abides in them.
–1 John 4:16b

Credits and References:
Stones by *BlueMoon. Used with permission
You Know Enough by Esther Hizsa, 2026
#36 in explore by ashley rose,. Used with permission
© Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim, 2026.
The unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without permission from Esther Hizsa is prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used provided there is a link to the original content and credit is given as follows: © Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim 2013-2026.  http://www.estherhizsa.com
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Count Yourself In

Posted on December 31, 2025 by Esther Hizsa

The gull stood on a rock in the sea.
Ferry wash struck the rock
and drenched her.

She shifted her stance
but remained,
webbed feet on cold mount,
as another wave splashed over her,
then, another,
and another.

Why does she keep standing there?

The next moment, she
swam away
as if the waves
were skipping rope, Double Dutch,
and she
was counting herself in.

That’s how You spoke to me
as I drank my tea
safe and warm inside the cottage
cold and wet inside my heart.

Count yourself in, You said.
Swim.
Fly.
Waves come
and waves go.
Feel the rhythm.
Hear the rhyme:
Count yourself in.
Count yourself in.
Count yourself in.

It is for freedom that Christ has set us free.
Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves
be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.
–Galatians 5:1

∗ ∗ ∗

A New Year’s Reflection

Take a few moments and be with the words and images in the poem.

  • As you look back over the past year, what have been cold waves in your life?
  • Imagine God with you, feeling what you feel, understanding and compassionate. How does God want to console you?
  • As you look ahead to the new year, what feels overwhelming? From what would you like to flee? Share this with God.
  • Now with God as a firm rock under your feet, turn to face your life as it is.
  • What do you need from God to “count yourself in”?
Credits and References:
Seagulls “0139362”, “0075321” and “0075172” by Alan Harper. Used with permission.
Poem “Count Yourself In” by Esther Hizsa, 2022; first posted Dec 30, 2022.
.
The unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without permission from Esther Hizsa is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used provided there is a link to the original content and credit is given as follows: © Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim 2013-2025.  http://www.estherhizsa.com
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The Word Became Flesh

Posted on December 24, 2025 by Esther Hizsa

The Word became flesh and blood,
    and moved into the neighbourhood.
We saw the glory with our own eyes,
    the one-of-a-kind glory,
    like Father, like Son,
Generous inside and out,
    true from start to finish.
-John 1:14 (The Message)

Credits and References:
Image of candle from Rawpixel Creative Commons.
“Emmanuel” by Esther Hizsa © 2014 
“Nativity”  by violscraper. Used with permission.
© Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim, 2025.
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without permission from Esther Hizsa is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used provided there is a link to the original content and credit is given as follows: © Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim 2013-2025.  http://www.estherhizsa.com
 
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Encountering God in Our Emotions

Posted on December 19, 2025 by Esther Hizsa

The Christmas season tends to evoke a range of emotions in us. While we express tidings of comfort and joy, we may feel anything but comforted or joyful. It’s good to pay attention to those unsettling feelings and listen to what they are saying.

“Why would I want to do that?” you may ask. “Won’t that get me into trouble or make me feel worse?”

factfaithfeeling

Perhaps you recall this train from Campus Crusade’s Four Spiritual Laws. Fact is the engine, Faith is the coal car, and Feeling, the caboose. The point of the illustration is that Christians need to rely on the truth of God’s word to guide them, no matter what they are feeling. “The train will run with or without a caboose,” the booklet explains.

This is helpful advice for times when our emotions overwhelm us and threaten to derail our faith. However, we need to take another look at the feeling caboose. We still don’t want it driving the train, but we have to stop uncoupling it from our lives. Our feelings, even the unpleasant ones, are holy ground. We can encounter God in them.

To do that, we must first become aware of God’s presence. St.Theophan the Recluse, a nineteenth-century Russian Orthodox priest, said, “To pray is to descend with the mind into the heart and there to stand before the face of the Lord, ever-present, all-seeing, within you.” So begin there. With your mind, imagine yourself meeting Christ in the core of your being. Stand before him. Look at him looking at you with love.

In his loving presence, tell Jesus about the event that incited the strong feeling you experience. It may help to picture the emotion as an angry cat, hair-raised and pacing. Now name the feeling. For example, it could be jealousy or loneliness. Don’t judge it or analyze it. Just let it hiss and meow there with you and Jesus. When there is a bit of space between you and your feeling, ask it what it wants to tell you. You may hear something like “I feel invisible when other people get the attention I crave” or “There’s something wrong with me; that’s why I’m alone.”

Watch how Jesus responds when he hears what your feelings say. Notice his compassion. What does he do and say next? Underneath your words is a longing Jesus wants to fill.

Once you’ve been with Jesus there, you may find your feisty feeling curled up in your lap, as harmless as a kitten. And you, having encountered the living God, will be transformed.

Cat by Kevin Dooley Where can I go from your Spirit?
    Where can I flee from your presence?
 If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
    if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
       – Psalm 139: 7,8 (NIV)

References and credits:
Encountering God in Our Emotions was originally published on this blog in 2014 and in Seed Cracked Open in 2019.
“Angry Pflümli” by Tambako the Jaguar   Used with permission.
First quote from Four Spiritual Laws by Campus Crusade
Second quote from Sanctuary of the Soul: Journey into Meditative Prayer by Richard J. Foster (pg 35).
“Cat” by Kevin Dooley. Used with permission.
Advent 4 by . Used with permission (visible in banner only). https://www.flickr.com/photos/126951011@N03/16066187976/in/photolist-qtHpWY
Thanks to Jeff Imbach who taught me this in Living from the Heart.  
© Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim, 2025. 
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without permission from Esther Hizsa is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used provided there is a link to the original content and credit is given as follows: © Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim 2013-2025  http://www.estherhizsa.wordpress.com.
 

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Christ In Me, With Me, For Me

Posted on December 12, 2025 by Esther Hizsa

This Advent, God’s been inviting me to live in the reality that Christ is in me, with me, and for me. I noticed, when I undertook a task or wrote a post, that I was not alone. I felt accompanied as I found the wisdom or words needed.

Recognizing God’s presence in those simple activities ignited a flicker of joy in my chest. That joy made me stop and breathe in that moment of awareness: I am in Christ, and he is in me.

As I did, I recalled the image of myself as a leaky bucket in the ocean of God’s love and remembered: all I long for I already have.

The part of me which focuses on my cracks reacted to that thought. I could provide a list of things I long for but don’t have, not possessions per se, but virtues. I wish I wasn’t so self-preoccupied, for example.

But the grounded part of me that sees God’s ocean of love welcomed that thought. Knowing my imperfections are bathed in love gave me hope. I am being transformed.

In Presence and Encounter, David G. Benner notes we often don’t recognize Christ’s presence because we lack awareness. Awareness “creates space and openness that allow us to be present to more than our usual self-preoccupations.”

“Hallelujah!” my heart cried when I read that. God’s gift of awareness is quieting the negative chatter in my head and freeing me to be more present to what’s before me.

No wonder I’m being led away from a busy life. God is slowing me down to make the turn onto a new road on my pilgrimage, where Christ reveals that every moment is eternal and every place ground holy.

Stillness by Christian.RudmanTake off, take off your shoes
This place you’re standing, it’s holy ground
Take off, take off your shoes
The spot you’re standing, it’s holy ground
–Holy Ground
Words by Woody Guthrie, 1954, Music by Frank London (The Klezmatics), 2003

Credits and references:
Christ In Me,  With Me, For Me was originally published on this blog in 2014 and in Seed Cracked Open in 2019.
Advent 3 by . Used with permission
Presence and Encounter: The Sacramental Possibilities of Everyday Life by David G. Benner, PhD, 2014, (p. 34).
“Stillness” by Christian.Rudman. Used with permission.
“Holy Ground” by the Klezmatics, Wonder Wheel, 2006.
© Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim, 2025.
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without permission from Esther Hizsa is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used provided there is a link to the original content and credit is given as follows: © Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim 2013-25  http://www.estherhizsa.wordpress.com.
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A Wondrous Thought

Posted on December 5, 2025 by Esther Hizsa

Pietro-Annigoni-Cristina-IAfter the angel Gabriel’s visit, Mary woke to a new reality.

The pondering of her heart emerged on her lips as she washed the dishes and passed by the beggars on her way to fetch water.

“My soul glorifies the Lord,” she sang to herself. “He has filled the hungry with good things and sent the rich away. From now on, all generations will call me blessed, for the Mighty One has done great things for me.” The Saviour is in me! What a wondrous thought.

But weeks passed and nothing changed. Mary began to wonder if it had all been a dream, until one morning a wave of nausea propelled her out of bed just in time. She threw up in the garden, then leaned against the clay brick wall, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand as perspiration cooled her brow.

It happened the next day and the next. Mary hadn’t dreamt it; she was pregnant with God’s Son. That first Advent, Mary wasn’t waiting for Christ to come. He was already there, her growing belly a testimony.

In our Advent, we, like Israel, cry, “How long, O Lord? Will you forget us forever? How long will you hide your face from us?” We keep looking for God to come in power and fill the hungry with good things. Meanwhile, the Holy Spirit has already overshadowed us, seeding Christ in us.

And now it is God who is waiting for us. God waits for us to awaken to a new reality, a wondrous thought that Christ is in us, with us, and for us.

We are being filled full of God.

I ask him that with both feet planted firmly on love, you’ll be able to take in with all followers of Jesus the extravagant dimensions of Christ’s love. Reach out and experience the breadth! Test its length! Plumb the depths! Rise to the heights! Live full lives, full in the fullness of God.

God can do anything, you know—far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams! He does it not by pushing us around but by working within us, his Spirit deeply and gently within us. –Ephesians 3:18-20 (The Message)

Credits and references:
“Cristina I” by Pietro Annigoni, 1910-1988.
Advent 2 by grosskopf_photography Used with permission.
Psalm 13:1; Luke 1: 26-38, 43, 48,49,53 (NIV), Ephesians 3:19
“A Wondrous Thought” was originally published on this blog in 2014 and in Seed Cracked Open in 2019.
© Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim, 2025.
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without permission from Esther Hizsa is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used provided there is a link to the original content and credit is given as follows: © Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim 2013-2025  http://www.estherhizsa.wordpress.com.
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Waiting

Posted on November 28, 2025 by Esther Hizsa

What if the one you are waiting for never comes?

It was only choir practice at the little United Church a mile away. My friend Edith and I were thirteen years old and proud to be the youngest members. Every Thursday, at seven-forty-five, after a couple in our church had milked their cows and changed their clothes, they would pull into our driveway to give me a ride.

That winter evening, at seven-forty, I got ready and waited in the kitchen. Ten minutes later, I was overheating and took off my toque and mitts. Five minutes after that, I needed to use the bathroom but didn’t dare leave my post. We would be late now, and they’d be in a hurry when they arrived.

At eight o’clock, a car drove by in the opposite direction. I watched the red taillights disappear down the gravel road.

At eight-fifteen, I took off my coat and boots and headed upstairs to my room.

“I thought you were going to the church,” my dad said.

“My ride didn’t come,” I replied. “I guess they forgot about me.”

I must not be that important, I thought and added that thought to all the other evidence I had collected that proved I didn’t matter.

For years after that Thursday night, waiting for anyone made me nervous. Finally, I learned to have a backup plan, even if it was only telling myself it wouldn’t be the end of me if they didn’t come.

This Sunday, Advent begins. It’s a whole season of waiting, and I am thrilled. I am thrilled because I know the One I am waiting for will come. He always does.

For hundreds of years, Israel waited for their Messiah. Finally, he came. The angel Gabriel announced the good news to a young virgin named Mary. She became pregnant by the Holy Spirit and gave birth to the Saviour of the world in Bethlehem, just as the prophets said.

Jesus came to earth because we matter. His Spirit remains with us now because we always will.

The people walking in darkness
    have seen a great light;
on those living in the land of deep darkness
    a light has dawned…
For to us a child is born,
    to us a son is given,
    and the government will be on his shoulders.
And he will be called
    Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God,
    Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.
           — Isaiah 9:2,6

Credits:
Advent 1 by grosskopf_photography Used with permission.
“Riding into the Sunset” by Wes Peck. Used with permission.
“Waiting” was originally published on this blog in 2014 and in Seed Cracked Open in 2019. 
© Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim, 2025.
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without permission from Esther Hizsa is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used provided there is a link to the original content and credit is given as follows: © Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim 2013-2025  http://www.estherhizsa.wordpress.com.

Posted in Advent, Childhood, Christmas, compassion, Reflections, Seed Cracked Open, Stories | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

When Love Happens

Posted on November 19, 2025 by Esther Hizsa

To love
and be loved.
We were made for this.
Love created the earth, the stars, the seas.
Everything and everyone was made of You,
from Love
by Love,
for Love.

Love is the one thing needed,
the command that keeps all others.

To see what love does–
there is no greater miracle,
no greater need.

So when Love happened,
as it did last week,
I didn’t have to imagine Your gratitude,
I felt it.

When we held the sadness
of a devastating loss, a marriage ended, a costly accident,
when we celebrated the gift of loving leadership
that transformed a community,
when the clouds of pain parted
and a ninety-two year old got to be herself
and know, in a way she never knew before,
what it feels like to be cherished–

it’s a wonder to behold,
a gift deeply treasured, 
a hope restored. 

Lord, my God when Your love spilled over
into creation
You thought of me.
I am from love of love for love.
–Jacqueline S Bergan and S Marie Schwan,
Take and Receive Series

Credits and References:
Best Friends by  Thomas Leuthard. Used with permission. 
When Love Happens by Esther Hizsa, 2025
Painting of girls by Jessie Wilcox Smith (September 6, 1863 – May 3, 1935)
© Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim, 2025.
The unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without permission from Esther Hizsa is prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used provided there is a link to the original content and credit is given as follows: © Esther Hizsa, An Everyday Pilgrim 2013-2025.  http://www.estherhizsa.com

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